Disabled not compensated means that the minute I am smashed in an accident I stop all productive activity. There has to be an alternative pay day when all of yours are terminated by injury. I WORKED AT THE CNR BUT I ALSO DID ART AND WRITING AND I PLAYED HARMONICA AND GUITAR. I NEEDED MY AFFLAC OUT OF WORK INSURANCE TO CONTINUE TO SUPPORT MUSIC AND ART. WITHOUT IT LIFE WAS EXTREMELY TAXING PHYSICALLY. IT WAS HARD TO DO A LOT OF WORK THAT WAS NOT ACCOMPLISHED SEATED. I NEEDED MY INSURANCE PAY
Thursday, July 30, 2020
Wednesday, July 22, 2020
MY STRENGTH AND CALM AND FEELING BALANCED IMPROVE WHEN I CLOSE MY EYES
THE TITLE STATEMENT MAY SEEM INCREDIBLE.
RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT I FEEL MUCH STRONGER AND BETTER WITH MY EYES CLOSED. I WALKED, (putting blown down clothes back on the line), LOOKED A BIT, WALKED, LOOKED A BIT AND I WAS ABLE TO STRIDE SO FIRMLY COMPARED WITH THE WAVERING SLIPPING TWISTING COLLAPSING USUAL.
I think laying down allows looking around but I remember having to lay there in the past with no viewing, just listening, that happened a lot. At the worst I could not even have sound, I had to just lay there.
Right now my arms are supported on my chair arms, I twist and rotate the chair as I type, locked in for support.
As soon as I close my eyes I can breathe so much better, it is a calming breath. I have to lie down now, I could force it but would end up exhausted.
Tuesday, July 14, 2020
TRAUMATIC BRAIN INJURY COULD BE A MAJOR FACTOR IN TONIC IMMOBILITY
THERE ARE MANY DEFICITS CAUSED BY TRAUMATIC BRAIN INJURY WHICH CAUSE MULTIPLE DISABILITIES.
I think that the primary symptom which I have experienced is fatigue and a lack of endurance. Not being able to stand or walk could well be a part of this which is accompanied by a bogging out if effort is required. Being startled, being hit by a spray of cold water or terrorized any one of those stimuli could trigger an overriding collapse. That is by no means a complete list of enervating stimuli.
When bogging out occurs in a motor it is caused by an inability to use the fuel it is getting which then chokes out the intake system. I try to relate this to how I can be suddenly strengthless when a situation that produces adrenalin occurs. Is it possible that I just cannot use the adrenalin, does it poison me or do I just shut down because I am usually not allowed to do anything in terrifying situations involving Police and in childhood, my mother? I have not been allowed to fight back and I remember being collapsed, jumped on as a child suppressed extorted and intimidated as an adult. Always, I am not permitted to fight back, not to have lawful process instituted and completed, even speaking in complaint wil be used by the inordinately powered and privleged women, authorities and Police to generate a terrifying assult and response and they will fabricate defamation.
VIRTUAL PARALYSIS, TONIC IMMOBILITY, COLLAPSE IMMOBILITY, EVEN SWAY BACK CAN BE SEEN TO BE RELATED TO THAT BOGGING OUT WHEN EFFORT IS REQUIRED.
Right after I was injured in 1967, I noticed that I had to lift my left leg with my hand pulling up on my pant leg if the lift was anything more than a few inches. I think my right leg just would not lift and I did not even try. In addition I noticed that I had to put my foot under the edge of cabinets to stand at a sink and wash dishes or vegetables. These and many more symptoms of Traumatic Brain Injury were reported to doctors, lawyers, the courts and no one recognized these universal symptoms of Traumatic Brain Injury.
When a force is exerted on my heels towards the rear, that leg collapses. If I point my toes, a calf charley horse can result. Pushing down with my leg, particularily the left, can cause an incredibly powerful thigh Charley Horse which has locked badly tearing ligaments or muscles in the leg. More symptoms of Traumatic Brain Injury.
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