Thursday, June 25, 2020

MY BUTTONS HAVE BEEN PUSHED SO MANY TIMES THEY ARE STUCK

I THINK THAT I HAVE BEEN ATTACKED, RAIDED GANGED UP ON AND DISREGARDED SO MANY TIMES THAT I AM IN A PERMANENT ADRENALIZED STATE OF HYPER- VIGILANCE.

 Down at the bottom of the page is an account of what bad behavior by Police can do to anyone. 

I know this is a discrediting statement. Why can I not get over it? Because I cannot get over what has been the negative stimulus applied to me and my life since I was four years old. Just the decade of childhod beatings could set a person up to be unable to deal with a 24/7 impending threat of a raid, forever.


There is a physical component. Swayback, Tonic Immobility and Virtual Paralysis are physical manifestations of the Shell Shocked Reality I live in.


If I could slow down to dead slow, eyes closed, I could slowly start to move about. I was doing that last night and this morning. Now it is evening and I have not succeded yet in just feeling nice and not listening carefully, always watching.


I am delicate, injured, and disabled but I am tall and I look healthy. That does not mean I am not screwed up by this. The continual tension, aprehension and anguish are not balanced by the release brought by sexual activity. The lack of any sexual contact does add to the unsettled nature of my experience and my mental state. Sexual activity leaves a person refreshed, purged of dissatisfaction, pleasured and relaxed. I do not have that.

 

I got married and to get me to leave her behind with my house my wife moved in and said she would not Cook Clean or Fuck. Great, I did everything for the Family that a Father could. I was all in here at Otter Point and nothing was left to do anything to get sex and if I did, what a horrible unfaithful man. No, what a horrible sadistic wife.  I was extorted to bankruptcy twice and finally divorced.   


I did have a girlfriend briefly then she became my old girlfriend with whom I had sex occasonally until six or seven years ago when she felt guilty about it. That was a shame because she was very skillful. I did not have any more sex of any kind with her but I did keep buying her repairs and a car and tires for it.  That was the end of my only opportunity to have sex after I was driven off my downtown Victoria suite. It does not feel good to never have any sex.

 

I HAVE STATED BEFORE THAT SEX AND AFFECTION WERE A LARGE PART OF WHAT IT TOOK TO RECOVER FROM TONIC IMMOBILITY. PRODUCING ART AND MUSIC ARE ALSO COMPONENTS OF A RECOVERY FROM ACUTE COLLAPSE IMMOBILITY.


I believe that I went all the way from Swayback and Virtual Paralysis to being able to perform on Harmonica and dance live on stage with exceptional force and demonstrating masculine dance moves through Music Practice and years ago Dance Practice.


I THINK I KNOW HOW TO FREE THOSE OVER PUSHED BUTTONS BUT I EXPERIENCE ONLY MORE PRESSURE.







TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 24, 2009

TORTURE IN CANADA

October 3 1996 at 3:30 pm RCMP Sergeant Zeike and RCMP Constable Hudson entered my private property and came into my home without a warrant or any form of lawful jurisdiction and manipulated the time and my transport which was the result of bogus charges so that I was kept in jail for an extended peroid of time and then tortured by being chained at the feet and wrists and around my waist and left in an unheated
unventalated truck van until I convulsed repeatedly and I have been very badly crippled since then.

The RCMP on isolated rural Vancouver Island exercise a brutal combative and reactive form of Police abuse taking advantage of the isolation the distance from urban centres the difficulties posed citizens who are abused by these Officers in that these persons such as myself are often alone and if we are hauled away from our rural properties it is very difficult to get back without having an automobile with us.

There is an attitude that every concivable or imagined offence has to be pursued and that if no evidence of any wrong doing is turned up try to find something else to charge against a citizen who has done nothing to harm anyone. Furthermore they make it plain as they hector and intimidate and rave at property owners and citizens that they don't think the penalties are stiff enough for any offence no matter how many or even if it's some form of statement offence where they simply take the word of a complaintant.

Continual incursions onto private property without lawful purpose by tresspassers Police and Regional District Enforcement Officers create a stuation where persons such as myself will simply tell them to go and get lost and stop with their nonsence. This unfortunetly as these Officers do not recongnize the authority of ownership creates a situation where they actually write in their files that they plan to try to charge an individual who has broken no laws but has offended him.

Hal Zeike and I invite you to access the articles he wrote in the Sooke BC News Mirror . He came to my door and  said that the letters that I wrote lawfully complaining had annoyed alot of people. I ended up chained up and tortured and crippled and the specific complaint which was used as an excuse to lock me up and torture me could not be supported by any evidence not even the complaintant was willing to swear under oath that the allegations he had made were true. I was chained up and tortured right here in Canada and I am still badly crippled. Is it really much more important what happened to one Afghan citizen at the hands of other Afghan citizens than what has been done to Canadian Citizen Lindon Collard right here in Canada? I know absolutly what is more important. 
Posted by at    

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)



Posted by at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)