From my log of condition which I have not made many entries into lately.

DISABLED NOT COMPENSATED: AN ABSURD OUTCOME FOR VICTIMS

A page on how I feel July 24 2023:

I have to lay down every few minutes. If I cling to the furniture I am surprisingly OK continuing to sit.

AS I SIT NOW, I PRESS DOWN WITH MY ELBOWS ON THE CHAIR ARMS AND PRESS UP ON THE BOTTOM OF THE UNDER TABLE SHELF. I FEEL RELIEF, I CAN BREATHE BETTER AND I AM NOT COLLAPSING OR FADING OUT.

EARLIER AS I SAT AT THE LOW TABLE, I NOTICED THIS CLINGING TO THE FURNITURE. I PUSHED DOWN ON THE FLOOR WITH MY LEGS. I HELD ON AND PULLED ON THE PILLOW ON MY CHAIR WITH MY LEFT HAND AND ARM . I JAMMED MY RIGHT BICEP AGAINST THE BED'S FRAME (AT A 3 OR 4 FOOT HEIGHT) AND I ROTATED IT ON THE OUTSIDE FORWARDS. THEN I WAS OK TO SIT.

IN THE PAST I REMEMBER CLINGING TO MY RECLINER AND JAMMING MY LEGS UNDER TABLES. 

I HAVE HAD THIS SITUATION WHERE INTERNAL TENSION HAS TO BE CREATED TO FEEL NORMAL MANY TIMES AND I TOLD DOCTORS AND THERAPISTS ABOUT IT,  BUT THEY HAD NO RESPONSE.

I WONDER IF THE MEDICAL PRACTITIONERS THINK I AM LYING OR FAKING OR IMAGINING THIS UNUSUAL SYMPTOM REMEDY.

I COULD UNDERSTAND WHY LAYING FLAT AND NOT MOVING WORKS. I HAVE USED TRACTION MANY TIMES AND I HAVE INVOLUNTARILY SPASMED AND HELD ON TO FURNITURE OR WALLS, DOORWAYS AND COUNTERS TO NOT SWOON OR COLLAPSE.

STIFF PERSON SYNDROME MIGHT ACT IN CONJUNCTION WITH OR SIMPLY ALONGSIDE OTHER FORMS OF VIRTUALLY PARALYZING DISABILITY.

WHEN I WAS READY TO DETERMINE THAT I HAVE HAD "STIFF MAN" SYNDROME FOR A LONG TIME, THE OTHER FORMS OF COLLAPSE I SUFFER CAME TO MIND.

I SUFFER FROM A COLLAPSE SITUATION TYPE OF VIRTUAL PARALYSIS. 

I RECALL WALKING DOWN THE HALLWAY A FEW DAYS AGO AND SUDDENLY FEELING MY RIGHT LEG LET GO AND START TO FOLD. I CAUGHT MYSELF AGAINST THE WALL. I STEPPED AHEAD AND MY LEFT LEG LET GO AND I CAUGHT MYSELF AGAIN. 

IF I WAS IN THE OPEN, SUCH AS ON THE LAWN, I WOULD PROBABLY FALL FROM EITHER ONE OF THE LEG COLLAPSES.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME LAST YEAR AS I WALKED PAST THE C-CAN WHEN IT BLOCKED THE DRIVEWAY.

MY LEFT LEG LET GO AND I WAS PITCHED DOWN TEN FEET INTO THE DITCH.

I HAVE NOT BEEN AS GOOD AS I WAS THAT DAY SINCE THAT HAPPENED. I ALSO HAD A CONVULSION AS I DROVE PAST THE ROCKCLIFFE A FEW MONTHS EARLIER.

I HAVE A PROBLEMATIC RECURRING BREATH STOPPING BACK LOCK UP OR REVERSE ARCH SPASM.

ARE LOCK UP, "STIFF PERSON SYNDROME" SHELL SHOCK, TONIC IMMOBILITY OR COLLAPSE IMMOBILITY RESPONSIBLE INDIVIDUALLY OR IN CONCERT  OR IS ALL OF THIS SIMPLY SPINAL CORD AND BRAIN INJURY?

UPON RECOVERING TO THE POINT WHERE I COULD PERFORM ON HARMONICA AND DANCE OR QUAD OR ROLLERBLADE, THE ACHIEVEMENT WAS NOT RECOGNIZED AND IT WOULD BE USED TO CLAIM I WAS NOT DISABLED.

THIS IS NOT A PICTURE OF MYSELF, LINDON COLLARD, BUT IT LOOKS VERY SIMILAR TO ME PERFORMING.

I WOULD SAY I HAD BEEN DISABLED SINCE 1970 AND IN RESPONSE I WOULD BE CHALLENGED BY ANY PHYSICAL ABILITY I HAD MANAGED TO RE-INSTITUTE OF MY FORMER ACTIVITIES. 

MANY ACTIVITIES WHICH I HAD ENJOYED OR WHICH I HAD WORKED AT PROGRESSIVELY BECAME  NO LONGER POSSIBLE FOR ME TO ACCOMPLISH BUT NO ONE EVER PAYS ANY ATTENTION TO THAT. I WOULD BE CHALLENGED AS TO WHY I WAS NO LONGER DOING SOMETHING AS IF IT WAS A WILLFUL OR WEAK OR DELINQUENT RESPONSE.

THE CAUSE OF THE ABANDONMENT OF ACTIVITIES IS THE DISABILITY I SUFFER.

I NEVER WILLINGLY GIVE UP ANYTHING I DO AS THERE IS NOT A WHOLE LOT OF CHOICE OF ACTIVITY, PARTICULARLY NOW, BUT I HAVE BEEN SIMILARLY VIRTUALLY PARALYZED IN THE PAST.

  

Stiff Person is lame.

THE DESIGNATION "STIFF PERSON" IS SO CONTRIVED IT RINGS CRACKED. 

THE ORIGINAL "STIFF MAN" EVOKES AN IMAGE WHICH SUGGESTS WHAT THE MALADY IS LIKE. I DID NOT DESCRIBE MYSELF AS STIFF BUT AS VIRTUALLY PARALYZED, ABLE TO MOVE AND STAND ONLY A LITTLE USUALLY AND SOMETIMES NOT ABLE TO MOVE AT ALL. 

I CAN LAY THERE AND I FEEL ALRIGHT BUT THE MOMENT I START TO MOVE I CAN FEEL SOMETHING IS WRONG AND I SHOULD RESUME A FLAT POSITION. 

THE VALUE IN THE "STIFF PERSON SYNDROME" IS IN ITS CATALOGING OF MANY SYMPTOMS AND THE "STIFF" RATHER THAN "COLLAPSED OR CONVULSED" I USE TO DESCRIBE THE SYMPTOMS I AM DISABLED BY.

I COULD REASSESS MY SYMPTOMS AS MUSCLES FIRE OR CONTRACT AND THEY WILL NOT RELAX AND FIRE AGAIN.

 I HAVE REPEATEDLY DESCRIBED HOW MY JOINTS ARE SPASMED, LOCKED AND IMPROPERLY ALIGNED. 

THE "STIFF PERSON SYNDROME" IS REFERENCED AS DISLOCATING JOINTS AND CAUSING HYPERLORDOSIS WHICH I REFERRED TO AS "SWAY BACK".

MANY OF THE SYMPTOMS WHICH I HAVE REPEATEDLY LINKED TO CHILDHOOD BEATING AND "THROWING DOWN" AND TO MY HEELS BEING EASILY PUSHED UP WHICH CAUSES A LEG COLLAPSE AND OTHER SYMPTOMS I HAVE SEEN AS THE SYMPTOMS OF 

SHELL SHOCK LIFE

SWAYBACK IS A COMMON SYMPTOM OF SHELL SHOCK.

 I HAVE AN ADVERSE OUTCOME WHEN I AM BULLIED OR INTIMIDATED OR ATTACKED AND THE "STIFF PERSON SYNDROME" LITERATURE REFERENCES THAT FEAR AND EMOTIONAL TRAUMA EXACERBATE THE EFFECTS CAN TRIGGER EPISODES OF "STIFF PERSON SYNDROME".

MORE SEVERE SYMPTOMS OF "STIFF PERSON SYNDROME" ARE TRIGGERED BY SHOCK. EMOTIONAL TRAUMA AND INJURY.

WHEN AN EVENT WOULD OCCUR THAT CAUSED A LONG TERM EXACERBATION OF THE STIFF PERSON SYNDROME SYMPTOMS I WOULD ATTRIBUTE THE RESULT TO THE INJURY FROM THE MOTOR VEHICLE CRASH OR COLLAPSE OR CONVULSION I HAD EXPERIENCED.

I AM SUSCEPTIBLE TO ADDITIONAL INJURY ANY TIME AN EVENT OCCURS BECAUSE OF MY DISABILITY.

IS THE STIFF PERSON SYNDROME ONE OF THE DEBILITATING EFFECTS OF:

 SHELL SHOCK LIFE